hurry

things are piling up. 

a lot faster than i was hoping too.

But i'm tarrance foster ii : son of a hustler and an intellectual. 

i'll make a way. losing is not an option and failure isn't in my dictionary.

my physical aloneness, i guess you could call it, keeps me sidetracked but no more. if there isn't green involved, money mostly, then i wont be around. how else am i to keep my pockets fat, eh?

jaden's birthday, my birthday, pop's birthday, bills, new car : i have to be ready for all these things.

i see myself in a nice shirt and tie get-up eating under the paris balloon or in the belliago, for no real reason other than because i want to. and of course, this is after i've taken myself to see the beatles show, also just because i want to. mhum.mhum. i can feel it. 

i'm going to be somebody. 

that is my anthem for life- seriously.

i'm a laser and soon, you'll see me beaming.

semicolon , closed parenthesis. 

be somebody.

thats what i want to do. i'm not sure how, though i feel like i don't need to know.
all i need to do is keep riding this breeze and continue to enjoy these deathly waters, as my dream instructed me to, so many months ago.

but i hate not knowing.
we all know that.

and still, something tells me that my free ride is coming to its close. i'm trying to find money in my fields of preference; acting, writing, teaching and the like. i've found a tutoring job for both an AP student and a group of young actors.

it'll give me something to do.

i started this post about two hours ago and i forgot where i was going with it.
it had something to do with the song you're listening to (or should be listening to) now and another song by the same band ,"use someone".

because i realize that, though i want to be somebody, though i want to be seen beaming, i could still use someone...someone like you.


semicolon , closed parenthesis

its here.

i'm highly annoyed.

i could list a few particular reasons but nothing that should really matter.

the little things. all 5634879201 of them that just so happen to add up.

and now i'm annoyed.

and i'm verbally abusing people.

i enjoy it.

the annoyance is here,

no telling how long this could last.

swift.

the downfall is coming. i can see it now. all this happy shit is bout to be out the window, watch. 

but if i can see it now, i can avoid it. preventive action. right? 

2 of the 3 sources of income i was expecting won't be coming. the third will conflict with my current. 

its kinda annoying having to juggle these jobs around each other.

rebound, Tarrance. rebound.

(now playing: "one is the loneliest number" -TheBeatles. guess we know that that means.) 

upgrade.

(i've had this weird affinity for the word "up" lately.)

i'm redoing my closet. again.
its time to grow up. all the way up.

button ups.
ties.
cardigans.
vest.
sweaters.
sweater vest.
boots.
etc.
like so:





















i've got the leather look down as Thelonious P has so smoothly recreated.
the other stuff is coming. fast too. ExpressMen, Armani...well anything i can find for a decent price. pockets aren't too fat.

but as you can see, not too many t-shirts and jeans. not anymore. and def no colored skinny jeans. (i only wore them twice.smh)

i just hope the desert agrees with my love for black and disdain for shorts. -_-


"semicolon, closed parenthesis."

mirror?

so i did some dabbling.
heard something that made me smile from ear to ear.
peep.



see what i mean?! what better influence than that?

music.

we've done nothing but bond lately.
from the Kings of Leon to MGMT to B.o.B. its been blissful. this is why i love her more than anything else in the world.

i've been indulging in classic rock (pink floyd, ACDC, Rolling Stones and the like) , more Beatles (as if i could ever have enough) and a lot of B.o.B. like..a LOT. hes very quickly made his way to #3 in my favorite rapper slot. and hes from the Eastside of atlanta. its like riding around eastpoint everytime i listen to a song.

it goes without saying that Lupe has been in constant rotation. thats daily life.
on 5/1 my life might change.
i'll be going to see Lupe Fiasco and B.o.B in concert.

let that sink.

for those of you who do not understand the lyrical severity of this event, please click the small "x" in the top right corner of your screen.
its gonna be bonkers. probably the best event of my life since losing my virginity. im hype beyond all belief. might even fly to NY to see it with Chuck, Joey and Sharmin.
maybe i'll find Trudy and tell her to fly here to see it with me. i wonder if she would. i'd really hate to see it with anybody less than a believer.




(sidenote: if i were a rapper, i'd be a mix between B.o.B and Lupe. )