madness

i've gone insane.
i dont know what more to say than that.
each day things get worse.
more vivid.
more real.
more painful, at times.
theres no stopping it.
i feel as though God is giving me the mindset of one of my characters from my book.

but i've gone numb.
searching for something more.
something fulfilling.
something...else.
the mind set of another character.

all the while...i'm totally content.
i dont need anything more than what i have.
and that is nothing.
but i'm content in finding the beauty of depravity.
the mindset of the final character.

all leading back to the fact that i've gone insane.

i have nothing. but i have it all.
"enjoy the chaos."