depression drinking.

i sit here. smirnoff in hand.
brain tingling. alone. but my music had kept me company.

i have given chase for far too long.
and i thought. rabbits are chased by hunters.
kids are chased by dogs.
criminals are chased by police.

none of those being chased want to be caught...so why am i still pursuing.?
an even better question would be: why am i being eluded in the first place.?

both are questions i have no answer to. and both are highly infuriating.

"i know you love me still..." i txted to her
"No." she responded.
"...you dont love me anymore.?"
"..."

so it seems her love for me has been forgotten.

and this is the woman who once swore her everlasting love for me.
interesting, right.?

who knows where this will go.?

with each word i type...
with every sip i take...
the more i feel my soul bubbling.
the more i feel my heart choking.
this is my life.

sigh.
here's to you heartache.