the doors.

the sun has just begun to peek over the Gary, Indiana apartment buildings.

my breath still taste like weed. and my ability to read haunts me.



recently, things have been looking up. going the direction i wanted, for once.

but two days ago that door slammed in my face. surprise, right.? (of course not.)



(the text messages start. one from a girl who claims to think she loves me though she has a boyfriend that shes quite happy with. and the other from a female who i would date if we weren't both carrying so much baggage.)
so as my daily texters make their entrances into my day i inspect each one.

one has a boyfriend so what progression is to be made.? "friend" is fine. i dont want anything more.

another is slightly bipolar. one wrong txt sends her off the deep end. i dont have the patience.

a third is a stripper. enough said.

this one has just as many emotional ties to their ex as i do. i could be wrong, but that doesnt seem like a good combo.

lastly, my least avid txter seems to only be interested when its convinent for her and otherwised interested in many of other fellas. of course, i only come to this conclusion from what my cursed eyes have told me.

so. as i close a few doors. or leave some cracked. or have them closed on me, i reacall my sister saying something.
"dont deal with none of them bitches. take time for you."
interesting. no women.? that means no dates...no sex...no late night convos.
(sounds something like the last half of my previous relationship.)

so this is what i've decided: i will let my emotions remain stale. those who will be interested will stay. some will leave. i've already placed my bets on who will do what and its not looking good. in the end...only my first two loves remain...music and writing.

the sun peeks its way inside for its last glance past these doors..